Is personal development something new?
Back when I was young (many decades ago) you were led to believe that you ‘should’ know most things when you became an adult. Not having the answer or doing something wrong was not a good look. I remember the words “What did you do that for?” when trying to do something new because I tried myself or misinterpreted the instructions.
This is furthest from the truth. We are learning every day, even when we don’t know it.
In today’s world we talk more and more about our own personal growth and development. For some this can feel quite scary as you could be stepping into the unknown, some don’t know what to say when asked what personal development they do, and there are those who relish personal development and do as much as they possibly can.
Our personal development / growth can be anything related to enhancing your skills, expanding your knowledge, learning more about yourself and/or what works for your wellbeing. How we go about this is personal to each of us and what it is we want to achieve.
Here are my favourite 7 tried and tested ways to support your growth.
Set personal Goals
Be clear exactly what it is you want to achieve? Explore what you will see, hear, feel etc. when you have achieved your goal. Be realistic about the timeline when you can reach this goal by.
Once you have this clear picture of your goal, you can then break this down into mini manageable goals/tasks. You can put these into a time plan and diarised for you to work through. Review this regularly, so you can amend, adjust, and flex when needed.
Having a clear plan to help improve your health, expand your career, or nurture relationships whilst helping you stay on track, committed and motivated. All developing you as you go.
Find your tribe.
Your tribe is always about having the right people around you – for you!
Make a list of who can help you, who you need to work with or who inspires you to continue your growth and development. Make a note of those you already have who supports you 100% with your vision.
Find yourself mentors, peers, or someone who will support your passion to learn and develop. Gain fresh perspectives, let them help you identify areas you are missing or who could be a great contact for you. You may find people who would like to collaborate with you on a specific development need. This in turn could lead to more learning as well as fun.
You will always find along the way some ‘nay sayers’. Those who will ask you ‘why do you want to do that for’, or some unsupportive comments. Gather a personal tribe for you who give you encouragement, emotional support and keep you accountable.
Step out of your comfort zone.
As we get older, we find it difficult or more challenging to step out of our comfort zone. Maybe we find it easier to do things we are not used to when we are younger as we do not know any different and all our peers are going through the same.
Taking yourself out of your comfort zone can be scary, depending on what it is you do to help you grow. The main thing here is to not compare yourself to other people. We each find things more challenging than others and we all have different backgrounds and experiences.
Push yourself to overcome those limitations you put on yourself and bit by bit become more comfortable with the things that stretch you. Challenge yourself each day to do one thing that scares you or every time you are in a specific situation.
Positive reflections and personal mindset
It is a normal human reaction to reflect on something you have done and only see the negatives. Part of our growth is to know that anything that hasn’t gone as well as you hoped is an opportunity to learn and develop. Therefore, there is nothing negative.
The skill here is to reframe your thought process when you reflect. Look at where you were strong, happiest, or confident. Were there areas where you need to learn or practice to become more confident next time. Make a note of these and give you self the opportunity to do something again.
I highly recommend keeping a journal of your achievements, your proudest moment or something you have appreciated during the day.
Seek personal feedback.
Love it or hate it, feedback is so important for our personal growth.
The challenge is people hate giving feedback as they don’t want to offend or hurt someone, or they are concerned about how/what the recipient’s reaction will be.
We don’t like to ask for feedback as most of us have experienced terrible feedback/ Start with our teachers at school, interview feedback (pipped at the post – yuk) or the “why did you do that” from an adult growing up when you tried to do something.
Feedback done properly and is constructive, helps us get a fresh perspective on what we are doing, seek to understand any blind spots and understand how you can progress. We need both positive and negative feedback – if they are both delivered in a constructive way.
Learn to love mistakes.
Mistakes are a key part of us learning.
Think about it, we don’t remember learning to walk, however, if you have witnessed a toddler learning to walk, you witness them falling on their bum several times or they learn to eat and miss their mouth. They still get up and walk and we encourage them to keep feeding themselves regardless of the mess. The same can be said with anything in life from dressing ourselves, learning to read and driving a car.
So, refrain from looking at mistakes as total failure and that you will never succeed. Try and try again or change your approach, identify areas for improvement, and use them as stepping stones to achieve your success.
Remember Self-Care
We all say we need to look after ourselves better, however, how often do we do it. As we know it is essential to help nourish our body mind and soul. It helps us maintain a balanced approach for all we want to do. Our personal growth can be increased by making time for activities that relax, energise, and rejuvenate us. Exercise, meditation, getting out in nature and our hobbies help.
Another part of self-care is protecting our boundaries and learning that it is okay to say no. Say no to anyone or anything that depletes you. Treat yourself like you would to anyone else who needs a break.
To conclude our personal development and personal growth are never going to end, they are lifelong pursuits. Depending on where we are in our life and the how important the development is, it required commitment, consistency, self-awareness, and dedication. My 7 ways above will help you along that way whether you are 28 or 78!
Personal growth and development are not a destination, is a continuous way of self-discovery and evolving who you are. It all helps you have a purposeful live on your terms and that you learn to live life more fully every day.
Looking for some accountability or someone to help you unlock what it is you want develop? Let’s have a chat about how coaching can help you. Visit my coaching page for more information – www.louisemcmilan.co.uk/coaching/
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